Hearing from the Lord
- Bianca Helen Estandarte
- 16 hours ago
- 8 min read
Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. Jeremiah 29:12-13
When I was in the early years of my walk with the Lord, I often heard the phrases "Sabi ni Lord... (the Lord said to/told me...)", and my usual responses were "Paano ba nila nasasabi na nakarinig sila from the Lord?" and "Sana marinig ko rin si Lord.". It bred a sense of insecurity because it's already very challenging to follow Jesus, and yet I don't hear him like other people. Is our relationship not deep enough? Am I not praying enough?
And when the time came, when I did hear from the Lord, hindi pala siya parang "Moses!" na napanood ko sa Prince of Egypt. So today, I'll try to paint a picture ng kung paano ko nasasabi na kinakausap ako ni Lord.
(Disclaimer: I'm only speaking for myself and based on my own experiences. If you have heard from the Lord similarly or differently, I encourage healthy conversation in the comments.)
The message confronts the truth and aligns with the Lord's character.
I will never forget the first time I heard from the Lord. We came home from a work trip, and usually, pag short work trips lang, we leave the car at Park&Fly so we can just drive back home (it's more cost-effective than taking a rideshare to and from the house). Yun lang, depending on the travel experience, nakakapagod pala siya. To cut a long story short, Drew fell asleep just for a few seconds while traffic was slow-moving, enough for our front to "kiss" the rear of another car right outside our village zone (Tulog din ako so, sorry na...). So we, and the driver of the other car, both stopped, inspected for any damages (There seemed to be none.), exchanged contact info and license photos, and Drew advised that if the driver finds anything or encounters any problems with the car, our insurance would take care of it. I thought, "Wow, ok na, thank you, Lord, makakauwi na kami!", and was confident that that was the end of it.
Days later, the driver asked us for ₱3,000+ as per a mechanic's quote to get her car fixed. A long (and somewhat escalated) FB conversation ensued between her, her husband, and Drew. Apparently, they didn't know how insurance claims work, so they went to a mechanic, got it fixed (I still don't know what it was, maybe a dent?), and wanted us to pay the tab. I was in the shower while all of it was happening, and I just started blurting out really mean words (agit na agit?!). And then words from deep within — nothing audible, nothing grand, said to me "Bakit galit na galit ka? Ginutom ba kita sa Australia? Magkano ang isang kain mo dun tapos galit na galit ka sa ₱3,000+?". Umiyak na lang talaga ako. I was humbled and felt instructed to tell Drew, "Sige na, bayaran mo na sila.". My heart was overflowing with anger, bitterness, and a sense of injustice, coupled with an irrational fear of potentially losing ₱3,000+ (Funny, I keep mentioning ₱3,000+ like it's a hint for a Maalaala Mo Kaya episode title.). But the Lord's character is oh so different.
...the Lord is gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. Psalm 145:8
But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? Matthew 6:30
The message is consistent and persistent.
"Lord, I have no doubts you want this homemaker thing for me. But this is no longer a question of whether I should leave the workforce, but more of when is the best time? Please tell me when it's time."
It has been my dream to become a homemaker ever since I was a kid. I wanted to take good care of my husband and my kids, and be present all the time — like my calling was to raise wonderful human beings. But as I grew older, I was exposed to an alternate reality where I should prove myself as a strong, independent woman, and that a household must have multiple sources of income to live decently. That has been our narrative since starting our family, but when I learned more about Jesus and Scripture, God has placed the dream back in my heart.
A lot of things were holding me back — A lucrative job; A promising role and career; The comforts of a lavish lifestyle; And worries about finances and the future. I remember telling the Lord, "Lord, I have no doubts you want this homemaker thing for me. But this is no longer a question of whether I should leave the workforce, but more of when is the best time? Please tell me when it's time.". I continued working for years longer with that prayer in my heart until one day, I was so stressed out at work that when my boss asked me how I was, I broke out crying and told her that I didn't want any of it anymore, and that was the end of my career. She asked me to take it easy, assured me that I was doing excellently despite the circumstances, gave me some other sound work advice, and asked me to talk again a week later. The following week, we talked again, and at the time, I was feeling really good and had no intentions of quitting anymore. And then she asked somewhere along the lines of "...But now that you're in a good place, how can you assure me that you're going to be ok and are going to be into this for the long run?". That was my cue. The company just started planning and implementing huge changes, and if I were to be in it, I should be in it for the long haul. So I told her what the Lord impressed to me, and we devised a plan to create processes and systems to transition to the next person over the course of 6 months.
At home, we also prepared for THE day and saved percentages of those 6 months' salaries to buffer adjusting to a one-income household. And then everything just fell into place — the company even gave me a profit share worth a month's salary, even though I already resigned.
The message may not make sense, but there is peace.
Another one of the reasons I was able to become a homemaker was that Drew reached the salary threshold that we prayed about. So when the Lord placed it in his heart to let go of his job a year after I resigned, it didn't make sense financially. It was the year our eldest was to celebrate her 18th birthday and would be going to college the following year. Plus, Drew was being led to join a special mission trip to Macau with the whole family. On the other hand, he was working 16-hour days with ministry work on the side, and our home already felt like the father of the house was an OFW (Huge respect for OFWs and OFW families — but this is a feeling we felt while Drew was really just trapped in our home office with loads of work and we have to video call him just to remind him to eat.). We prayed so hard and even said that we'll make a decision when we hear from the Lord after a our congregation's prayer & fasting week — as if starving ourselves will be some sort of guarantee we'll hear the Lord's answer to our prayers.
(NOTE: Prayer and fasting are not a means to twist God's arm into answering prayers or releasing blessings. While we do seek these things as well, we pray and fast as a spiritual discipline to consecrate and humble ourselves, and foster intimacy with God — surrendering and aligning our plans to his will.)
...allowed him to be more present now as we prepare for the arrival of another one of God's greatest blessings, a baby boy.
But even before prayer and fasting, I received a message from Scripture. In chapter 4 of the book of Esther, Esther agreed to help the Jews even before she requested to hold a fast on her behalf, and I felt the Lord was teaching me about obedience first before outcomes, purpose before provision.
Go, gather all the Jews to be found in Susa, and hold a fast on my behalf, and do not eat or drink for three days, night or day. I and my young women will also fast as you do. Then I will go to the king, though it is against the law, and if I perish, I perish.” Esther 4:16.
Drew ended up resigning, and what we thought of as a 1-month rest turned into 4 excruciating months of not knowing where our provisions would come from. Yet somehow, we were ok — we had peace. Our family of 4 still went to Macau. We still celebrated our eldest's debut with a nice party surrounded by friends and loved ones. Yes, we have already tapped into several of our other resources and even accumulated credit card debt, but the Lord was with us through it all. He planted seeds of his calling in our children. We learned to be better stewards of our finances and are on the road to making lasting changes. He showed his faithfulness and, in effect, increased ours. Provisions poured out in several forms from several people. And ayun nga, nagka-work rin ulit si Drew, which may not be paying as much, but allowed him to be more present now as we prepare for the arrival of another one of God's greatest blessings, a baby boy.
The message can be confirmed by your spiritual family.
There's a longstanding Christian inside joke that wives are the voice of the Holy Spirit. But it wasn't entirely my "Esther revelation" that solidified the decision for Drew to resign in 2025. One day, he attended Kape-Kape, a regular men-only Bible study and fellowship. During one of the sessions, a widower shared how he realized that all the hours he spent working for a version of a future that he could comfortably enjoy with his wife and family were meaningless because that version didn't include the untimely passing of his wife. His experience taught Drew that the future is uncertain, but we can trust in the Lord who holds our future. When it was his turn to share his reflection, other men encouraged him with their own testimonies of when they, too, had lost their jobs and how the Lord's grace abounded.
Oftentimes, we find ourselves at a crossroads of two or more competing life decisions that don't have very obvious pros and cons. Even things that seem good may not be from the Lord, and things that may seem awful can be God's mercy and redirection. But the Lord never intended for us to walk this journey alone. Our spiritual family also hears from the Lord and can be great sounding boards, helping us weigh our thoughts and feelings through shared lives so we can make prayerful and confident decisions.
Does it mean we ALWAYS hear from the Lord now? NO.
Sometimes He can be silent, yet his silence doesn't equate indifference. His thoughts are higher than our thoughts, and His ways higher than our ways, and we can trust that the Lord is working for our good.
Sometimes our own circumstances and distractions can also dull our discernment. But He can relay messages to us in many different ways. And we are only able to recognize His voice if we know him and have a true relationship with Him, which can only be achieved by hearing, reading, and meditating on His Word.
My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. John 10:27
So if there are moments when you don't sense, or feel, or perceive the Lord's message, that's ok. I encourage you to read the Bible, and that is enough.
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